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remember the first time I really noticed that sexuality was important to older people. I was working as a nurse unit manager in a residential aged care unit when a nurse reported that John, one of the male residents, was masturbating while she assisted him to shower. She felt she “shouldn’t have to put up with that”. I agreed with her, but added that the resident had the right to masturbate. We had to find a way to balance John’s right to sexual expression and the nurse’s right to a safe workplace.

In conversations with staff it became apparent that John had only started masturbating in the shower since he began wearing a new continence pad we were trialling. The product looked a bit like a big nappy, and worked a lot like a chastity belt. Because he was cognitively impaired, he couldn’t open the pad to reach his genitals and masturbate, and so staff working the night shift volunteered to take off the pad at 6am so he could spend time naked and masturbate. Once we did this, John stopped masturbating in the shower.