Taking dildo (photos)

Stick a suction cup dildo to a flat surface, have your partner lay back, and take turns riding it while teasing each other. One of my clients called this “the ultimate tease game” because the sight of her partner taking control and grinding made her even more eager for her turn.

Page duBois, a classicist and feminist theorist, suggests that dildos were present in Greek art because the ancient Greek male imagination found it difficult to conceive of sex taking place without penetration. Therefore, female masturbation or sex between women required an artificial phallus to be used. Greek dildos were often made out of leather stuffed with wool in order to give it varying degrees of thickness and firmness. They were often lubricated with olive oil, and used for sexual practice and other activities. The Greeks were also one of the first groups to use the term “toy” in reference to a dildo.

Inserting a big dildo can feel a bit intimidating especially if you’re new to larger toys. But don’t worry—it’s all about taking your time, being kind to yourself, and following a few simple steps to make the experience as enjoyable as possible. As a sexologist with over 10 years of experience helping people improve their sexual health, I’ve guided many people through new and sometimes daunting experiences in the bedroom. So I’m here to walk you through everything you need to know to make this a safe and fun journey.

One thing to keep in mind is that taking a big dildo is not a race. Speed is not your friend here (in fact, it will be your worst enemy). Think of it like savoring your favorite meal; you want to enjoy each bite not just gobble it down. Slowly guide the sex toy in and give yourself permission to stop and adjust if you need to. The goal is to make each inch feel good. If something feels off don’t hesitate to pause for a bit.

Using a dildo safely means being mindful of your body and taking it slow. Here are some key tips: